Mmkay - so I may have chickened out a bit...I went to Target and bought some clothes. I was feeling really intimidated about the prospect of the teeny tiny stitches.
Here what we came up with:
Fashion Show MC: Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome Vera Wrong's "The Chillin' With My Strongbow Cider" look
Fashion Show MC: Complete with accessories: Bitchin' shades and the ever-present cell phone. It can be looped on your belt, but unfortunately, Ken's beltless pants have a velcro butt closure.
Ken: Barbie, I think it's for you!
Barbie: Get an iPhone, loser. You're so 1998.
Fashion Show MC: Uh, Ken? What's up with the cuffed one-legged look? Did you bike here? Chain Snagging your pants?
Ken: Ha ha! No Mr FSMC. I just wanted to show the folks my spiffy Keds.
Fashion Show MC: Stop it Ken, you're just embarrassing yourself now. Go backstage and change into your second outfit.
Ken: But don't you want to see how I can slide my super shades onto my head...?
Fashion Show MC: Seriously, stop it. Get back there and undo that velcro. Trot on! Trot, trot!
Ken: I've pretty much had enough of the whole runway thing. I think I'm going to hit the track for real and go for a run in my sweats, swishy track pants, and matching shades and blue tinted sunnies.
Fashion Show MC: Not in those Man Slides you're not.
Ken: Oh! Ha ha...look at that. These are Chad's shower slippers. I must've accidentally picked them up when we were showering together at the gym...err...
Ken: Uh, maybe I'll just stroll over to the track anyway and, umm, help Chad stretch.
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5 comments:
I need to get me some of those blue shades.
Please don't return Ken. I think you should keep him. Who knows what other adventures you could have?! Or maybe I could get one! ...wow, is it sad that I just recommended I, a grown woman, buy herself a Ken doll as a companion?
Happy Thanksgiving.
"Further adventures of not gay Ken"
Yes, you need to keep him. And you need to get him friends.
How else will you have "Ken's totally not gay celebrity hot tub party?"
True story: My parents thought it was important that both their kids grow up with a matter-of-fact understanding of the, um, differences between male and female anatomy. Which was great... until I pulled the pants off a Ken doll that my friend Felicia had just received for her 3rd birthday and screamed, "Where's the PENIS?!!!"
That is hilarious! Oh man - that just made my otherwise dour day.
Leave it to Whiskey to send me here.
How on earth did I miss this bit of genious ?
Um can you please email me when you're going to post brilliance like this ;)
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