- Cheesy barf on his face, clothes and my shoulder.
- Pee down the front of his onesie, my bra, naked tummy, underwear, freshly shaved and lotioned legs and the carpet below.
- Milk dripping out of my boobs onto his face, shoulder, onesie and my tummy.
- Then he pooped ferociously. (Luckily I had the presence of mind to whip on a poorly placed diaper before we got to the nursing chair. It held.)
There we were, sitting in squalour, me wondering what the hell just happened. I went from this
in a matter of seconds.